It sucks to be happy for someone, to be happy that they’re having fun and doing things that make them happy, when it means you’re getting pushed away during the process. It fucking sucks, but I am happy for them.

I knew that my friends could always slip away. I’m not stupid. It’s happened before and it’ll happen again. I’ve done it, I’ve pushed people away. But for everyone to do it themselves all at once?
I’ve talked to my two best friends once in the last twenty-four hours. Once.
I don’t know how to do this, how to be alone like this. It’s killing me, and I don’t want to get off my couch. I just want to lay here and wait for it to be done.

